Finding Each Other (POEM)

I hear that word so many times in my head

Engraved in my mind from all my teenage fantasies

I still hear it, even older as it goes deeper

To remind me that realities are never from the far-fetched

And so, I will say truly that I IWISH

Not for a prince in shining armor

Not for a king to crown Queen

And never for a solution to all my problems

I just want us to find each other

Not because we got nothing else

Not because our Africans moms are reminding us that the clock is ticking

I want us to find each other in the dark as it would be in the light

I don’t want loneliness to throw me in your arms

I pray you never come to me just because I am another option on the list

I want us to find each other, in that traffic morning running to work,

Hurrying on with our lives like we have got something to prove.

I want you to look at me like I am just another face and

yet my eyes beseech you not to look away.

For that unexpected normal Monday to turn into a rich story to tell the kids.

That we weren’t looking and yet we saw.

I don’t want to be with you just because I am 25 and you are another milestone to achieve

I don’t want to love you just because everything tells me to. NO!

I want to want you because that’s all there is.

I want to give you my heart even if everything in our lives feels wrong

For I want that in the end that You be that thing that feels right.

For you are not a resolution, but my absolution.

I want to love your normal and ride your hectic.

I want to feel that arm around my waist in that crowded room and know that is YOU.

I want us to find each other

Not because there is marriage next but love forever

Find me, at my worst day maybe; no makeup and running off to catch a bus

For life gives no breaks to me. As I may miss the sight of you.

Love me, not because I am beautiful and it shall feel good to stand by your side.

But because there is something about me that tells you that I can fall by your side.

I don’t want the normal rules to apply.

Just because we grew up and hustled and now walking down the aisle is what's next.

For commitment isn’t what grows but us to each other.

Find me and keep me for God’s sake!

For I am that treasure you stumble upon once.

For I am that restless wind that erases the steps for you to never find your way to me

Keep me. For my eyes can only seek you in all that you love

Your favorite color. Your favorite place. Your favorite movie.

I will love all of you;

For every piece of you in my hands feels as heavy.

By UBB

I resent...You (POEM)

I resent all that you stand for

I resent that’s what drew me to you in the first place

I resent that hating you is getting easier by the day

For my sermon to choose you seems hypocritical

I resent that I feel small to a bigger sight of you

I resent all these mixed up feelings that get me stuck in the headlights

I am not sorry; I just want you gone

If you feel that way, go the other way and let’s never meet at any crossroads

No choice should ever be birthed from this and yet the human that I am wants to reject you before you do it to me.

I despise what this is doing to me, and should just let go

But for what all that I feel can’t take away that it is still you

You built a wall and I made it permanent

Together we added bricks to cement that old grudge

For each wants to win at this battle of holding back

There is a huge lump in my throat that I am winning

It’s crazy that what led to this was just that an unspoken disappointment

I am no judge or jury but I can see the verdict that lies between us

That we are ending…

That what we could be no longer holds that trophy

We are turning into the walking dead that smells any blood as long it ain’t us

I know I will find us at any stage, shouting the loudest

Advising the multitudes for what we can never tell each other in that dark room

We turned black and blue from all that silent backlash

I can’t seem to move towards you anymore

We can’t seem to find each other in the light

For what shines brighter is we ain’t enough anymore

That truth is a consolation to me, an ointment to a wound that I carried for so long

That I no longer have to try

That loving you was becoming a loss

That gnawed on that person that once a cared

I wonder if my new found freedom means that I am that exception to a rule

That old skeleton finally out

For a reality check that I wasn’t haunted

For I was the ghost.

By UBB

Dear R. (Poem)

I hold my pen now

As i can't hold your hand yet

To tell myself what i can't tell you yet

I can count on my fingers

The words we've exchanged

The non-significant times to the world but my own

Where my barriers shook, second guessing my persona

Wanting to be someone else, maybe one who can catch your eye.

Wondering how high are the stakes to win you over or lose myself over you.

You disrupted my world the very moment my eyes landed on you

You questioned my very ways of living by just existing

You've become such a big part of my thoughts,

I sometimes wonder, if i dwell in yours as well?

Every inch of who you are fascinates me

From the move of your hands to the shuffle of your feet

You scare me as much as you fascinate me

Conflicted to run away or get to you

Torn between the urge to know you or behold you from afar

I have lived so many lives, been so many people

I wonder who do i offer to you?

And would you take me if I did?

So, many questions for answers yet to come

To live in the present for a future yet to be

My heart soars at a glimpse of you

To feel so many things for a life not yet intertwined with mine

to reach out for an mirage that's fading

for a question that burns my lips

can we be? can we truly be ever be R?

By UBB

P.S: The picture is of one my favorite movies called "Warm bodies" the zombie character is called R. but the poem is dedicated to another person i do call R.